Monday, October 10, 2005

Matt show and then some.

Working merch was so much fun... tiring at times but fun. Big Red blew a tire and so Ashley and I were asked to keep Justin's phone and ID and AAA card... and we ended up with the keys to the van. Hehe we where trusted with a lot. We even got to hang out with Matt and Justin while counting out merch and cleaning up.

I don't normally get personal in my blog's but I feel as though I need to get this out. Today I over heard my step-dad calling me (pardon my language it's a direct quote here) a "fuck up". There was times in school where I worked so hard to make up classes... in fact me graduating on time was a surprise to a lot of people. My last year of high school was far from being easy and now I want a year off. I feel like I've earned it but I also I feel like I need to figure out what to do with my life. I keep having dreams where I die... I was told that it could mean big changes in my life or that I feel as though I have failed... both seem to be true. Part of me feels as though I have failed because I'm not joining a huge part of my class in college and up until a feel weeks ago I was going to college. Even though I can play off what my step-dad says about me... what he said really hurt.

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